The Adventures of Naughty Miss Jones

'cos naughty miss jones knows vibrators. Visit me at

I know how to get the boys excited, and it starts with an ‘S’ and ends with an ‘ex Toys’.

Even if you haven’t tried it, every single one of you lads has to admit you get a little hot under the collar about the prospect of your favourite lady playing with a brand new toy. If you’ve thought about it before, or are just thinking about it now and realising ‘actually, yeah, I DO like that thought…’ admit it, your sex life could be enhanced by a little investment.

You’ve admitted it? great, now time to go shopping. Allow me, Naughty Miss Jones, to be your personal assistant in this exciting and mysterious process. Just follow my steps and prepare yourself for fun times ahead.

1. Think about your lady… No, not like that, about the sort of person she is

Is she the type to bake cupcakes and are most of her knickers of the pretty lace variety? Probably best to avoid the hardcore metal stuff then, and go for something a little prettier. My suggestion is something like this:

Similarly, if your lady love is a virgin to the sex toy scene, maybe best to avoid the multi-function, multipurpose rotating, pulsating  model, and keep it simple, something like this is perfect:

2. Now…. think about your lady… Yes, like that

Different ladies like different things. As her lover, I hope you have figured out by now what floats her boat. When looking for a toy for your lady, read about what it does and how it works. Is the product designed for clitoral stimulation, or is it for internal use (or perhaps both)?.

HOT Tip – if there are certain places your lady won’t let you go, you can bet your bottom (pardon the pun) dollar no toy will go there either.  Don’t… Even… Bother.

3. Labels Matter

There are some cheap and tacky products out there. Buying one of these is the equivalent to presenting your girl with flowers picked up at the servo… we may smile, but I assure you we are not impressed. Some great, feminine brands your lady will truly appreciate include Fun Factory, Big Teaze and BSwish.

4. Start with Lube

Not sure how your girl will react to a toy? test the waters with a bit of good ol’ fashioned lube. I am never shy to sing the merits of this glorious stuff, and by introducing a variety with a few bells and whistles (think tingles or warming) her mind will be a little more open to trying different things. This is my personal favourite of the tingling variety

5. Sex is (sometimes) a game for two

You’re buying this toy for the both of you, right? so think about your needs, and what you like, too. Something that vibrates feels excellent against your man bits (or so I have been told), or you can even get toys like this; it looks like the standard rabbit but the ears are actually a removable cock ring:

6. Take the quiz

If you’re still baffled by the difference between a butterfly and a bullet, I have thankfully prepared a quick quiz to help you make your choice. It can be found at my home page, top left hand side, and you can thank me later.

Best of luck with your purchase.

And in the meantime ladies… ah, gentlemen, happy vibing

Naughty Miss Jones xx

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