The Adventures of Naughty Miss Jones

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When you have spent the night before exercising, you need to refuel. It’s a simple case of calories in, calories out, particularly if you intend to go back for ‘Round 2’.

Don’t get alarmed, dear reader, I have not converted into a health nut and I don’t intend to devote the next 400 words to the merits of ‘clean eating’ (I’m still the girl with 12 different kinds of cheese in her fridge). I do, however, want to take a moment to celebrate what is surely one of modern societies greatest inventions; the morning after brunch. Be you a sweet or savoury kinda’ gal, lingering over the papers and pile of pancakes/ eggs/ salmon/ bacon all washed down with several coffees (to get your energy back, please refer above to my comments re: Round 2) is truly, truly awesome.

I like to think that, in addition to sex toys, this is a topic I know a thing or two about (a girl of many talents I am) and being a sharer, I hereby provide for your gastronomic pleasure, the Naughty Miss Jones’ Guide to Sydney’s Best Brunch.

Whether you wake up in the North, South, East or West (and whether it’s your bed or someone else’s, I’m not judging), I humbly suggest the following:

  • Brown Sugar – Bondi – my No.1 go to. I have been devouring the ‘5 sides’ for years and intend to keep doing so for many more.

  • Tiger Mottle – Paddington – these people make a bubble and squeak that is out of this world, and it’s a cosy setting (if you’re trying to keep the romantic mood going).

  • Kiss the Barista – Sandringham – this comes recommended from one of my lovely ladies, who assures me the barista are all quite kissable and you actually get some of those little lolly lips with every coffee (gotta love a novelty pull).

  • Rag Land – Waterloo – I went there on the weekend for the first time. 4 words people. Side – of – pork – belly. Yep, you heard me right. you can have pork belly with anything on the menu. In the words of Arnie, I’ll be back.

  • Kafenio – Cronulla – even though they don’t do skim milk, their food is pretty good. Also an excellent vantage point to ‘people watch’.

  • Shenkin – Erskineville – if you’re super duper about-to-eat-your-arm-off hungry, give this one a miss, cos you are likely to be in for a little wait. But it’s worth it. Go for the Israli big breakfast.

  • Four 8 Five – Surry Hills – I love, love, love the Mexican breakfast but, given its bean count, this might be one to save for when your with girlfriends.

  • La grande bouffe – Rozelle – feel like whisking him away to romantic France? Get real, and perhaps try the slightly more realistic option of this place (and have a breaky baguette).

I look forward to hearing your feedback. To finish off, allow me to leave you with one little piece of advice. Frittatas Freeze. So, if you’re anticipating a night where you would rather ‘eat breakfast in bed’ (wink wink, nudge nudge), may I suggest you buy/ make one of these in advance, and simply heat it up. Not only will he think your’e a demon in the bedroom, he’ll see you as a whiz in the kitchen too.

Naughty Miss Jones xx

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